Guilt and Chocolate

Two things which are very closely related for many of us. Guilt, and chocolate. Some of us feel guilty after eating chocolate, while some of us are guilty of not eating enough. I like to think I'm the later, although I am most probably the former.

Although it must be said that this thread has nothing to do with chocolate - even though it has a chocolatey theme... This thread is about guilt, and the abundance of which I feel for abandoning you, my readers for what seems like an eternity.

In some ways, blogging felt like the rebound girl you have after a long term relationship. I had just ended - rather abruptly - my relationship with facebook, and felt that something was needed to fill the void. Almost how many smokers take up chewing gum, or knitting... But this should not have been the case. Blogging shouldn't have been my rebound girl, as now I feel bad for abusing its trust and taking it for a ride. I plan to make a lasting commitment to the blog, not some sleazy cure to a to a distructive faux-social relationship. From here on in, I plan to stop using cheesy pickup lines and make a stand... Blog, if you'll have me back, I swear to be true to you!

But this isn't where the chocolate metaphor ends... Just as I was guilty for not being there for my blog, I didn't want to use it to distract me from other issue. As an example, how people use food to cheer themselves up, or to create a distraction from the obvious issues which plague them. I didn't want blog to be my post relationship my one night stand, or my wonderfully distracting, comforting, soothing, tasty, melt in your mouth chocolate.

I'm a uni student, and I felt that time spent blogging was time that could have been spent studying. The study never happened, either did the blogging, and in a period where scholarly creativity should have flourished, the void created by my lack of motivation and need for "procrastudy" (see earlier blog entry) became all consuming.

So now, although I have enough uni work to last well into the coming week, I am here, seeking to repair the fractured relationship I've had with my blog, and to apologise to it, and you in turn, for being a bad blogger.

Instead of fearing chocolate, and how complacent and fat it may make me - I will indulge in the chocolate of blog, and suffer the consequences of reality!